“Sometimes “No” is the kindest word.”
― Vironika Tugaleva
All she ever heard:
Was no you can’t go!
No you can’t stay!
No you would not like this at all!
No you won’t fit in!
No it’s not your type of people!
No I don’t want you following me!
No I don’t want to be seen with you!
No can you just go home!
As she hung her head in defeat and retreated to the place in her mind where NO was a place of acceptance the phone rang. It was in that moment she realized that NO was the kindest word she had ever heard because in a blink of an eye everything had just changed.
Written by Angie
“That if desperate times call for desperate measures, then I’m free to act as desperately as I wish.”
― Suzanne Collins, Catching Fire
The situation is like this: freedom of choice!
Buy a car or steal a car
Get an education or drop out
Argue or walk away
Study or fail
Follow or lead
Respect or disrespect
Honor or disobey
Do or doubt
Love or hate
Kill or heal
Give or take
I can go on and on with the comparisons of choices but desperation causes people to make rash decisions. You never know what another person is faced with until you are put in their position. It’s easy for us to say what we would not do but you just don’t know.
The seemingly mountains that are before you will cause you to question your decision making patterns in life. Do I have a choice? Desperate measures leads to desperate actions:
The mother who can’t feed her child and the kid is looking her in the face. The dad who could not pay his rent because he was laid off from work. The child who has test sitting in front of them knowing if they don’t pass the test it would keep them from passing the course. The young man who is trying to fit in with the crowd because he always felt alone. The young lady who is being pressure into having sex but she don’t want to lose the only person she feels that has ever loved her. The kid that is sexually confused but afraid to vocalize it so they experiment with their thoughts.
Desperation draws you into territory you have never traveled before…
Desperation will cause you to make a permanent decision based on a temporary situation….
Desperation will cause you to forget your integrity….
Desperation will cause you to pull a trigger…
Desperation will cause you to turn a trick, cheat on a test, join a gang, steal, kill, lie…….
WE are free to act as desperately as we wish however in the end the CONSEQUENCES belongs to us!!!!
“There are two kinds of fears: rational and irrational- or in simpler terms, fears that make sense and fears that don’t.”
― Lemony Snicket
Rational: based on reason or logic
Irrational: not logical or reasonable
Fear can get the best of us….
What causes a grown person to turn into a gold medalist track star when they see a spider? What causes a person with limited one-sided thinking to all of a sudden become a Phd holder in a subject because they think they know it all? What cause an individual to stay in the home and never want to leave their home? What causes people to make hate comments about someone else? What causes people to turn their backs on the very people who have helped them?
I could go on and on with the “what causes” questions but all the answers would be the same and the answer would be “fear.” FEAR (False Evidence Appearing Real)! Late summer and early fall somehow someway centipedes always find their way into my bathroom in the middle of the night. The night light is on and of course at 2 or 3 am your eyes can play tricks on you. However, my eyes always seems to zoom in on the spider with millions of legs looking at me. First reaction is panic and then it’s fight or flight. My option is always flight and I pray I don’t have to use the bathroom again before anyone else gets up in the morning so they can kill it first. (When I look back it really is amusing)
So I ask myself was that rational fear or irrational fear. HMMMMMM in my mind it is rational fear because in my eyes it’s a killer bug that is going to take me out. But in retrospect my fears are irrational because the bug is running just as fast as I am in the other direction. So we both are scared for our lives and do not know why!!!
Fear is a powerful thing if your allow it overtake you in the wrong way. Irrational fear will cause you to make decisions that you would not make had you been in your right mind. Now do not get me wrong what I may think is irrational someone else may think it is rational in their mind and vice versa. When I was maybe 23 or 24 my best friend from high school died at the age of 25. With me not understanding completely what was going on in her body and the medical conditions she had I ceased living because I had fear that I would not make it to 25 either. I was careful and cautious of every move I made and was just waiting for my life to end the same way. My mother died of breast cancer at 48 so again this was a moment of rational fear in my mind that I was going to die the same way so every lump from the age of 30 was a death sentence for me in my mind. I confined myself to one place in my mind because I could not rise above the fear of death.
Another moment of rational fear was when I was in the bank down the street from where I worked with some of my co-workers. I was standing in the teller line and I saw a man outside of the window show me his gun. I told my co-worker and the person in the bank and security was sent out there but he disappeared only to appear again when we were walking across the street to get lunch. Due to the some quick thinking and lots of praying we lost him because he followed us into the restaurant but we quickly darted out of the opposite door. I could have hid and never went outside again or into that bank but that is not how life works so I had to overcome that fear and keep on living.
Living in fear is one of the worse things a person could ever do in life. It causes you to miss out on life and in a vapor of a second life can end just like that. You decide rather rational or irrational is fear important enough for you to just give up on your dreams. You decide is fear important enough to miss out on living each day to the fullest. You decide if fear is important enough for you to run in the opposite direction of where you should be going (even if it is a spider lol). You decide if fear is important enough for you to miss out on important events. You decide is fear important enough for you to hate someone based on how they look instead of trying to get to know them. You decide if fear is important enough for you to be giving someone the side eye because they are doing what you desire to do!
It is time to face your fears and rise about everything that is keeping you from moving forward!!!
“Clear thinking at the wrong moment can stifle creativity.”
― Karl Lagerfeld
We spend so much of our life trying to prove everything right that we never take the time to prepare to be wrong in order for us to learn from our mistake. It is our moments of not understanding why things are happening the way they are for us to come up with creative solutions to fix the problem.
The problem isn’t that we didn’t know how to fix them it is that we never took the time to think outside of the norm to allow the creativity that is hidden inside to come forth. If you look back over some of the errors that you have made throughout the course of your life you will see how creative you became when it was time to right the wrong.
Your creativity becomes stifled when you wait for someone to help you figure it out. I love to sew and my greatest creations comes from mistakes that I make. I love to see everything just perfect but some times depending on what kind of material I am working with it does not always work out like that. I have crooked lines, and diagonal cuts, button holes too large and sometimes materials that do not mesh well together. It does not make me give up it just causes me to take my oops moments and change them into creative opportunities. They do not always come immediately because my mind is still thinking about the error I made and how can I make it perfectly again.
When my judgement is no longer clear I then have an AH HA moment. The crooked lines are now changed to zig zag decorative lines. The diagonal cuts become high low skirts or dresses. The button holes that were too big are now covered with a decorative flower and a snap is put in the place of the button instead. The fabrics that initially do not look right together now become one of my greatest masterpieces. If I would have never made a mistake I would not have taken the opportunity to figure out how to do something different.
The moral of the story is sometimes it takes making an error and not being able to figure things out at the moment for you to come up with the most creative solution. There is always more than one way to get something done it just takes getting out of self in order to figure it out.
“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.”
― Ralph Waldo Emerson
Your way is not my way and my way is not your way! I embrace you and you embrace me without thinking I should conform to your way of thinking or doing things. When you look in the mirror embrace your way of life and realize all that comes along with it! Don’t turn your nose up at me! Don’t point your fingers at me! Don’t whisper when I walk by! Don’t laugh at me and I will give you the same courtesy.
Created to be yourself not a duplicate! Looking around you will see so many people who are different shapes, colors, sizes, genders and nationalities. No one is greater than the other so embrace our way of life..
We all have a path laid out before us. If you veer to the left or right you may end up falling just like I will…so again our way of life belongs to us not others.
Never lower yourself to the level of others by trying to justify who you are….do yourself the greatest favor and accept who you are and those things you don’t like then change them!
“In the serenity and quiet of this lovely place, touch the depths of truth, feel the hem of Heaven. And when you leave, don’t forget why you came…”
― Oksana Rus
One Sunday morning she arose and dressed in her finest clothes and headed to church because she wanted to experience peace on Earth just a little bit longer
She smiled brightly at me and whispered softly in my ear “I love you” because she knew words had power
Never wanting anyone to feel less than special when they were in her presence she treated them with kindness because she knew why she came
Her time was approaching and she knew it but she wouldn’t leave the cage until the right wind could take her to the place she needed to be
As the key slowly turned and the gate began to open she began to feel the freedom of letting go…. and she slowly began to coast like an eagle
Her take off was slow because she was fighting the current to make sure WE were alright however slowly the momentum began to pick up as she went from coasting to soaring
Never forgetting why she came
So I leave you with this thought an eagle knows the purpose for which they have come
They know when to coast and they know when to accelerate…….
Today “our” eagle we celebrate your acceleration !!!!!!
“Joy is the infallible sign of the presence of God.”
― Pierre Teilhard de Chardin
As she sat with her head bowed for so many years
Something inside of her was still allowing her to rise each day
Slowly her head began to rise and the twinkle returned to her eyes
From the depths of her soul
Arose the biggest smile
Because the joy that was once
Lost could now be found
Because she realized that God was there all the time!