It became her song…..

It became her song…..

“To me, the greatest pleasure of writing is not what it’s about, but the music the words make.”
― Truman Capote

Blank wall

music

Filled with notes

Visions in her mind

Stroke after stroke

If you listen closely

To the words she wrote

You will soon began to understand the song in her heart

Sometimes the words were full of:

Passion

Anger

Hope

Trust

Hate

Love

Day by day the words change because the song was never the same

Today she found solace in knowing why it became her song

Angela

Who has your heart?

“Anger, resentment and jealousy doesn’t change the heart of others– it only changes yours.”
― Shannon L. Alder

As each hand tugged slowly at her heart she felt herself slowly losing a portion of it to each one of them. She struggled to stay sane but anger from hurt wouldn’t allow her to walk away free. She would not allow anyone new into her heart because she was still holding onto the resentment from the anger she felt toward those who did her wrong. Her jealousy raged because she tried to do right and everything still did not go as she hoped. So she looked on in envy wondering why they got what she thought she deserved. They had her heart on strings like a puppet.

tugging heart

 

So much was going on and she could not figure out exactly who had her heart. Did she give it to one that made her angry? Did she give it to the people she loved so much but now resented just as much? Did she give it to the people she wanted to mimic because she thought they had it going on? Did she leave it behind the wall that she built so she would not get hurt again? Did she lose it playing a game of Russian Roulette? Did she give it away trying to please someone else? It became a questionable game to her!

question

She asked herself question after question and the only answer that made any sense was she lost it when she gave it to the highest bidder. At that point she finally figured out she was forever changed because she no longer was the owner of her heart. “It’s a most distressing affliction to have a sentimental heart and a skeptical mind.”
― نجيب محفوظ  If you are questioning your decision then maybe it was not the best one!

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Expectations

“Expectations should not always be taken as reality; because you never know when you will be disappointed.”
― Samuel P. Huntington

expectation

What did you expect?

When you open your eyes this morning

Ohhh you expected that your day would be perfect

When you ask your kids to make their beds

You expected they would do it without an attitude

When you got in the car

You expected gas to be in the car

When you got to Starbucks

You expected that waitress would be having a great morning

When you dropped the kids off at school

You expected they would have their lunch

That when you got to work late

You expected your boss to be in the office not at the time clock

That when you got off of work

That the traffic wouldn’t be bumper to bumper

Or that the Pastor wouldn’t call a last minute meeting

And you just wanted to go home and relax

Or you would be making mash potatoes

And you expected to have milk in the refrigerator

Oh!!! I know you expected the PERFECT DAY!

Did you forget?

That things happen that you have no control over and it does not mean it is the end of your life

That people are human and they have bad days as well!

Expectation versus reality 

Reality is that things happen but it is up to you to allow it to change your expectations or not

Never allow someone else to set the expectations for your DAY

You are in control of your destination not someone else!

cropped-angela-cursive1.jpg

 

 

 

 

 

Who’s your influence?

influencer 2

“One of the greatest regrets in life is being what others would want you to be, rather than being yourself.”
― Shannon L. Alder

Yesterday… (Insecure)

You took a step I took a step

You drank I drank

You cursed I cursed

You stole I stole

You lied I lied

You cried I cried

You were lost I was lost

You chose red I chose red

You gossiped I gossiped

You got angry I got angry

You were happy I was happy

You lead and I followed

We shared one brained because you were my influenceinfluencer

Today….(Certainty)

I don’t look like you

I don’t act like you

I don’t want to do what you do

I don’t want to be what you are

I don’t like red I like purple

I like to laugh and be happy not angry

I like who I am!

I was created to lead and not to follow

Life is too valuable to conform to the image of someone else

conform

Angela